Restroom Conspiracy

Both of the urinals on my floor at work had 'Out of Order' signs on them yesterday. I was curious why because they seemed to have worked fine the day before, but I was more concerned with the fact that BOTH of them were out. I don't know much about plumbing, so I'm not going to make any assumptions about that. But given the fact that the rest of the toilets in the restroom, the kind that are sat upon, are in complete working order, I can only surmise that something is wrong with the urinals' automatic flushing device. I've long held a conspiracy theory that the electronic 'eye' that senses when the best time to trigger the automatic flushing device doesn't actually do that at all. Sometimes, when I enter the restroom, I see that the urinal is unflushed. How is this possible? Has someone found a way to beat the system? At the risk of sounding completely crazy, I will say that it may [trigger the mechanism], but at the very least, this is not the sole purpose of the aforementioned device.

I believe the electronic eye actually senses how long a mass is standing at the urinal and records the time to use in data collection for more devious plans. Now, my company is pretty 'Big Brother'-ish and I wouldn't put it past them to track how long their employees are using the urinals to determine how much productivity they're losing. Maybe they're using the data and it's part of a much bigger scale to see how long men across the country are standing in front of urinals and they'll use this time to create ultra-short advertising bits to show on video screens above the urinals. They already have print ads, what would keep them from having video? Because, every skeptic and pessimist you talk to (at least in my line of work) is that print is dying a very quick death and that video is the way to go.

I'm a little riled-up right now. I think I'll take a break before I let out a little bit more of my crazy.